“Failure is not an option”…

Next time someone says that to me, I just may respond with “Says who?” And then I’d patiently wait for that person to seriously tell me where God declared failure to be out of the equation of life. I may even throw in that right, failure is not an option… it is inevitable. It is as much a part of life as breathing. And just like breathing, failure is full of necessity and purpose.

My view on failure is different than what we’re generally taught. I wish I could say that I’ve always embraced failure as an occurrence meant to propel me closer to my purpose and to enhance me spiritually and emotionally. However, the truth is that for such a long time I would strive to avoid failure like the plague…and whenever failure made its entrance in my life, I would crumble and nearly drown in the idea of not being able to be perfect… of not being capable of having a boyfriend in high school like everyone else, of not getting a D+ in Family and Consumer Science because I suck as cooking, of not graduating from my first college institution in 2012, of not being able to avoid depression and anxiety and suicide attempts, of not being able to find a passion and career with a higher salary, of not having the funds to save money over time, of not being able to refrain from impulsively buying sour candy and pretty journals every time I go to Target, of not being that perfect friend who texts and calls consistently and who can hold a conversation for hours with no awkwardness or huge gaps of silence. Etc.

It wasn’t until I started looking at life through God’s lenses instead of the world’s that the truth about failure settled into my mind. He told me that I was fearfully and wonderfully made… that I was loved and known by Him before I was even knitted in my mother’s womb… that whether I’m in a season of abundance or a season of scarcity, His love remains, His presence is consistent, and my importance is solidified…and that through contentment in every season of life, joy and peace will be achieved.

And now, gradually, failure is becoming less of a handicap and more of a stepping stone to greater. For me, the connotation of failure is now filled with enhancement, self-awareness, reflection, and strength. It is no longer about not reaching the milestones thrown onto me by society; failure is about learning how to navigate through unexpected outcomes while seeing the beauty in each one.

I used to pray that failure doesn’t find me… now I thank God for them, and the growth that follows.

xoxo Sheesh.

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